Affair Handbook

Affairs and sexual indiscretion in relationships have been regularly occurring in society since the dawn of monogamy. Every case feels unique to the couple involved, but the excuses for cheating are usually common. Falling out of love, becoming unsatisfied with the current sexual relationship, finding a younger and more adventurous fling, the list goes on and none of them are new. Many relationships continue on happily for decades, while others end after a few months or even a few years. Today, however, it feels like relationships built on a solid foundation – Read how to build a loving relationship – are still falling apart more than ever. The old excuses are still there and always will be, but new reasons for unsatisfying marriages seem to be evolving as times change and technology affects our culture more and more.

Technology Has Lead To A Raise In Affairs

The meteoric rise of technology and internet in the last two decades has changed the lives of everyone in the world and shifted the consistencies of relationships. Long distance is no longer so long when more than 90% of the world’s population has cell phones and access to internet. Read the stats here Video chatting and social media closes the gaps across the world and makes keeping in touch with loved ones that much easier. However, the ease of the internet and technology has also had detrimental effects on the modern marriage. Countless websites have evolved that are specifically for arranging an extramarital affair with women in the same zip code and smart phones even have specific applications that hide indiscretions. When it’s so easy to accomplish and so easy to hide, many men and women who are determined to cheat no longer have reasons not to. The modern world could not survive without the current technological advancements, but these are only a couple ways technology has affected the dynamic of marriage.

Pornography has now become so ubiquitously available that every man or woman can sit down at a laptop and find countless videos of any sexual scenario they can imagine. Due to the increased availability and usage of free pornography, sexual dissatisfaction has increased to staggering percentages. Younger generations have had limitless free porn since puberty, and now many find it difficult to find sexual compatibility in new relationships. Not to say that pornography and masturbation alone are ruining marriages, but the increase in availability and usage has definitely affected the expectations for a healthy love life. Unfortunately, sexual dissatisfaction is one of the primary causes of extramarital affairs, and the numbers are on the rise.

The Economy Can Be A Driving Factor With Affairs

At least in the United States, the current fluctuations in the country economy have also had an impact on marital stress. Universally, money has been one of the central problems for monogamous relationships since standardized currency has been in circulation. Read About The Cost Of Having An Affair Here. The decrease in the middle class seen in the last two decades was caused in large part by increased debt in response to cost of living and a damaged economy, which has been a large contributor to unhappiness in relationships. Every country and every time sees cycles of prosperity and poverty, and the number of affairs catalyzed by money problems in a marriage rises when jobs become scarce, income decreases, and debt drowns the relationship. This cycle also disagrees with the current consumer culture thriving around the world. Technology breeds speed and convenience, which creates an “I want it, so I’m going to take it” philosophy that influences individuals to make decisions for narcissistic reasons. Many people who have affairs justify it to themselves with flimsy excuses when they really just wanted to sleep with someone different from their spouse, whether multiple times or just once.

As times change and culture evolves, there may be new variables influencing the rate at which affairs occur and marriages end. In the 1950s and 1960s, affairs for many working men were convenient because most of their wives stayed home throughout the day. All they had to do was avoid the house and conjure an excuse to justify why they were an hour late for dinner. Now, the omnipresence of pornography, convenience of internet-catalyzed affairs, and advanced smartphones make affairs easier to accomplish if issues in the marriage are compelling one of the partners to consider adultery. As time goes on and society advances further, many of these issues will become as outdated as the above example from the mid-twentieth century. However, there are many base reasons that adulterers use to justify their lifestyle and choices, and the time will only reveal new ways that affairs can be accomplished and hidden by those compelled to have them.